9.12.10

Team Vitesse Seeks Divine Intervention

Fresh from their most successful season in the professional peleton, Team Vitesse is set to announce a new approach to training. Thus far sporadic training with a virtual manager (Johan the Omniscient) has resulted in riders snatching superb victories with too much effort. Dr K2 has noticed that Johan has changed his timbre this year. "I believe that Johan got religion somewhere" mused the good doctor.
Johan's new plan is to call upon divinities, both past and present, to augment an already strenuous and extensive training program. For instance, early in the season, h2o experienced an inordinate number of flat tyres. Having identified this as a potential nuisance, Team Vitesse has retained the services of Phlatus, Averter of Punctures, to watch over its athletes. Pheedus, the spirit overseeing feed zones will leave the services of Radio Shack to join the retinue of divinities who will be channeled by Johan.
Johan believes that channeling divinities will be chicken feed, "I often feel the spirits at the casino. They speak loudest after I pass out." Team members are unsure of how well Johan can drive the virtual team car, provide tactical guidance and channel while passed out. "Johan is a master of the multi-task" spouted Lampo Bianco from the new WORC (Western Oceanographic Research Cosmodrome).

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